Five Kids and a Credit Card

(Auntie Becca, that title is for you(-: )

My life has changed allot this year, especially the last month.
I am traveling with His Little Feet again this year.
With a totally new choir and a new staff member (my "little" brother Jake(-: ) as well as our wonderful new Tour Leaders Jeff and Becca, many things are different.
It has been a time of adjustment, pressing, growing, loving, prayer, repentance, seeing my lack and God's faithfulness.

I can remember one day in particular where I was just so tired and feeling so emotional and stressed and I thought "why am I like this? What is going on with me?"
As I look back I know that it was not God's fault, it was mine.

I once heard a story about an old couple who were riding in their truck, the man driving the women in the passenger seat. They came to a stop light and the women looked out the passenger window at a young couple in the truck next to theirs. The young women was all snuggled up close to the young guy with her arm through his as he drove.
The old women said to her husband "remember when we were like that?"
He answered "I haven't moved"

That is sort of the realization that I had this week...God hasn't moved. He's still being just as faithful as He ever has been. If I'm not feeling close to Him it's not His fault...it's mine.
So this week has been a week of refocusing my eyes on the One Whom I love and Who loves me.

He is ever faithful and good!

How Deep the Father's Love for Us,
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
To make a wretch His treasure

How great the pain of searing loss,
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the chosen One,
Bring many sons to glory

Behold the Man upon a cross,
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed I hear my mocking voice,
Call out among the scoffers

It was my sin that left Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished

I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast in Jesus Christ
His death and resurrection

Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom
(REPEAT)


Thank You Father, for Your love!

Christ is Risen

Christ is risen from the dead,
Trampling over death by death, come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave.
Christ is risen from the dead,
We are one with Him again, come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave.

O death, where is your sting?
O hell where is your victory?
O church, come stand in the light,
The glory of God has defeated the night
O death, where is your sting?
O hell, where is your victory?
O church, come stand in the light
Our God is not dead He's alive, He's ALIVE!

Only The Beginning...

I think it was a cool morning in the Fall 2010. If I recall correctly, it was one of those mornings in Colorado when the air was colder than the water, which caused a sort of foggy mist to hang over the lake at Ellerslie, by which I was walking.

On this particular morning, out by the lake, I was talking to Jesus.
You see, in my heart a longing was stirring, or rather was continuing to stir, as it had been there a while, a longing that I didn't see being filled any time to soon.

There had been times in the past when this longing would begin to bubble up, but I was usually pretty successful in pushing it down and putting it in Jesus hands. However there were times when that was easier than others.

This was one of those times when the longing was bubbling up more forcefully than usual and needed some attending to. Hence this time out by the lake.

Shortly before the end of my basic semester at Ellerslie I had applied for an internship with His Little Feet. It seemed like such a good fit for me. I could see so many ways that it seemed the Lord had been preparing me for this position. A longing began to form in my heart.

After waiting, putting it in the Lords hands, and crying out for His joy, whether I got the position or not, on August 10th 2010 I found out that I didn't get it.

The Lord was faithful (as He always is! Deu 7:9, Isa 49:7, 1Tim 5:24, 2Tim 3:3, Rev 19:11) and He filled me with joy, even though I didn't get the position.

So after a little brake I went back to Ellerslie and started my, "Advanced Leadership Training". Oh what a blessing that time was! I grew so much in those weeks and months and learned many things that would have been harder (I think) to learn on the road with HLF.

God grew and stretched me through that time at Ellerslie and I truly enjoyed it, but every once in a while that familiar longing would bubble up in my heart. It was usually easier to quell when the HLF team was out on the road and not around (I lived in the same building with them and when they were around I saw and heard allot of them:D It was great! And hard.) However, they would occasionally come back to the Ellerslie campus for short brakes in between their tour travels. As was the case during the time of the above mentioned Fall morning.

So there I was, out by the lake, talking to Jesus about it.

What I said went something like this "Jesus, You know how much I want this. But, if it's going to take me away from You, I don't want to touch it!"

And I meant it. I did long to be a part of this ministry that is impacting children from different parts of the world, as well as churches and families right here in the US, but if being a part of this ministry was going to take me anywhere, but closer to Jesus, I didn't want any part of it.

I think sometimes when I just talk things out- bring them into the light instead of just shoving them down- I see things more clearly, and that's what seemed to be the case on this day.

That is a memorable day to me. It was a day when I sat my desire before the Lord and found that even though it was intense, it fell short to my desire and longing for more of Him. I found that no matter what the enemy had to say about it, Jesus truly was first in my heart and my desire in wanting to work with HLF was a desire for Him and not just me. It was a desire that He was growing (even though I may not have fully grasped that at the time).

It was months later (I had already graduated from Ellerslie and had spent the Summer at home) on August 25th 2011 that I got a phone call from Mike Hahn, President and Co-founder of His Little Feet.
What he said changed my life for the next 9-10 months... and forever.

It was something like this, "Kourtney, we would like to invite you to be a part of the His Little Feet team"...

After months of waiting, praying, trusting, my God had proven faithful once again! He had tilled the ground, prepared the soil and planted a desire in my heart like a little seed. Then He had poured water on it and out of the rich dark soil I had seen a little shoot. I had longed to enjoy it right away, but my Daddy told me to wait, be patient. During that time of waiting He continued to till, water, weed and prune and when the time was just right He allowed me to see the first small bloom. I am now getting to enjoy sharing the fragrance of that small blossom with Him, and I am so thankful that He made me wait! But, even as beautiful as this small blossom is, I know that this is only one step in the amazing adventure that this life with Jesus is. He has more in store and I have a feeling this is only the beginning...

Christianity...

...is not simply the world seeing good in the people of God,
but rather the world seeing the good of the God of the people!

PRAISE JESUS!

With about 14 out of the last 18 days over 100 degrees and the other 4 days in the high 90's this mornings going out to mid 60's-ish was beautiful!


What's even better is I don't know that it has even sprinkled (maybe it has a tiny bit, I'm not sure) since the post I wrote on June 29th titled "He Opened the Floodgates". Well today He did it again!
I love Jesus!

God is a good God, YES HE IS!!

My brothers and sister and I thanked Jesus as the rain came pouring down. It is lovely to see puddles of water after so many days of dry hot weather!

Thank You Jesus!
We humbled ourselves and prayed and You are healing our land!

"If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land." 2Chr 7:14

He Opened the Floodgates!

Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think,...Unto him be glory

Eph 3:20a & 21a

God is SO good!!

So we have been having quite a dry spell lately. We have been praying for rain.
Today when I was on my way back to the house from having my morning time with Jesus, I saw the cracks in the dry, thirsty ground and asked Jesus to fill those cracks with water.
The song "Open the Floodgates of Heaven, Let it Rain" has not only been reverberating in my head and heart, but has also been sung and hummed by other members of the family quite allot lately.
It would be one thing if we did have over a hundred head of cattle on our land (my Daddy's doing lease grassing, leasing our land out to a man to graze his cattle on), then it might not been such a big deal, though the horses probably wouldn't like it so much if the grass dried up.
So Momma and I decided that we were going to start praying for rain. We thought it would be fun if we just prayed for fat cows. We thought it would be quite a testimony if we had no grass and still had fat cows. Then we saw the problems with that. The man who owns the cows would probably move them if we didn't have any grass. Even if they were fat. He might not have the faith to believe they would stay that way without any grass :D So I suggested we pray for 1) Green grass. 2) Fat cows. 3) a jolly owner (who would want to leave his cows with us).
Well, after the pond in the pasture where my Papa's cows are dried up I could see the wisdom of praying for rain. God knew what He was doing when He made rain. It's allot easier just to pray for rain than to pray for green grass, fat cows, a jolly owner, water in the pond, the cracks in the ground to be filled...yeah, it's just wiser:D

So yesterday it looked like it was going to rain. Anticipation was high.
I heard someone say there wasn't supposed to be rain for another ten days or maybe this weekend at the earliest.
Was God going to do it?
That night the rain went around us. It was as if God was saying "Do you trust me?"
I had faith that my God would come through, He's ALWAYS faithful, maybe not always the way we think He should be, but He always is nonetheless.

Tonight I looked out the window at the huge, lumbering, gray cloud coming our way loaded down with water. Was this the answer to our prayers?
A small succession of pale colorful stripes began to peak out of the bluish gray mass. It began to get brighter and longer.
I asked John if he saw the rainbow and he asked "did He answer my prayers? I prayed for a rainbow!"
What had started out as a short pale striped piece of an arch soon grew brighter and stretched into a full ark with a dim ark above it. Not only that, but soon we could see one end resting in our pasture (something I've never seen before)God is so good to us!

It had been raining for a while now and John and I were out on the trampoline jumping and singing praises to our wonderful God. Thanking Jesus for His goodness in sending us rain. We were getting quite wet.
I had read and explained (the best I could) Ephesians 3:20 to John the night before and after I reminded him he quoted it in his own words over and over saying "He is able to do EXCEEDINGLY, ABUNDANTLY, ABOVE ALL we could ask or EVEN thing!!"
After a while I got off the trampoline. I could still hear John singing praises.
The rain began to stop. I walked over to John who had stopped singing and asked "Did you stop praising Him John?" He said "I'm praising Him in my heart." To which I replied something like "It stopped raining". He began to loudly praise Jesus once again and the other kids joined in. The rain began to pour once again.
We praised our Jesus for the wonderful rain. It only rain for about 30 or 40 minutes, but as Daddy, Mom and I were talking afterward, we think this is just the beginning. Sort of like the appetizer before the meal.
So this post is my offering of praise unto the One Who is able to do EXCEEDINGLY, ABUNDANTLY, ABOVE ALL that we ask or think! To HIM be glory! I Love You Jesus!

Praise Jesus!

Sing all ye little ones
To the goodness of God!
Praise the Lamb of Righteousness
For shedding His blood!

In the words of Mr. NRJohnson "Oh what a Jesus!"

If your wondering what I am celebrating about, just wait until you hear. It will most likely make you want to celebrate too!

Yet another sheep has entered the fold. Yet another sinner has found forgiveness and cleansing by the wonderful sacrifice of Christ!

Oh the glorious thought that the sacrifice that was made 2,000 years ago on that cross, the blood that was shed is still efficacious for the sinners of this present day.

This glorious event which has all the angels rejoicing in heaven, brings to mind a verse from a song that says:
"My sin, oh the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin not in part, but the whole
is nailed to the cross and I bare it no more
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord O my soul"

Okay let me rein it in a bit.
So here's the story: we have a young man staying with us these days. He's in his early teens.
So this young gentlemen-in-the-making had stated that he wanted to learn about God. Well I guess he came to the right place!
Not many days have elapsed since our young friend came to stay with us and yet God has done a work. God does not always take days and weeks to do the work He has set out to do. As was evidenced tonight when this young G-I-T-M gave his heart to Jesus.
"He's grinning from ear to ear" Said Momma upon entering the room after seeing said gentlemen to bed.

Hmm... if this is the state of a mere human, what must be the rejoicing in heaven?

Of Mosquitoes a Cat and Persistence

This morning while I was having some quite time with the Lord, I got two lessons in persistence.

The first
I usually come outside in the early morning to be alone with Jesus and so far I haven't had much of a problem with distractions from the nature around me, usual it does the opposite, pointing my eyes to Christ.
But this morning as I was sitting out up against our gate an element of the nature around me began to invade my quite time.
This particular invasion was just that, it was a pesky nuisance and a distraction. It was persistent and annoying and itchy. If you haven't guessed it yet, it was mosquitoes. The little pests. For some reason they seemed to like my fingers this morning.
I would be sitting there, not bothering them, and they would come souring in and with that nasty little straw-like fixture on the front of there faces they would proceed to steal from the supply of blood with which I have been entrusted. Well, that wasn't about to happen without a fight! And I must say, most of them came out allot worse off than I did.

The Second
On my morning outings with Jesus we have obtained a tag-along. We usually have two, but one is a little more persistent than the other.
Each morning when I go out these two friends will usually fallow me around.
Well the smaller of the two has taken a fancy to getting a good scratching (which I made the mistake of giving her one morning, now she thinks she can have one every morning).
So this morning, I went out a little earlier than usual and nether of my friends were around.
I whistled for D.J. (our Border Collie) but I guess it was a little early for him.
Okay, I'll just be alone than this morning. I wasn't to perturbed by the idea. But then, as I came to my spot up by the gate, seemingly out of no-ware comes my other little friend. How she happened to be right by where I was going to by I don't know.
So in her usual fashion she began to rub “up and down and all the way around”.
In my usual fashion, I tried to ignore her.
I calmly took my seat and she began to persistently rub her nose and head under and around my hands, trying somehow to get them to scratch again. While, she wasn't that successful, so then she did something that wasn't acceptable! She unsheathed her claws and proceed to grab my hands and climb up my legs. She had already been pushed away, but she got a pretty good shove this time. (just encase you hadn't guessed- and I'm not quite sure what to say if you haven't- this friend is our little gray and white kitty, Lace or Lacy- I'm not sure which, she's Kay's cat)
So after that she went backed to nosing around my hands and amazingly they began to scratch. Hay, if it keeps her from clawing, I don't mind scratching her head a bit.

So these to episodes got me to thinking, why would a mosquito be willing to risk life and limb for just a few drops (if that) of blood?
And why would a little cat be willing to face rejection and “persecution” for a little scratch on the head?

The Conclusions I Came To:
For the mosquito: they had to have it. It was the very substance they had to have to sustain their life. Without it they would have died anyway.
For the cat: it was her joy and delight. She was willing to face a little hardship to gain what she held dear.

My Questions:
Are we so hungry for more of Christ that we are willing to risk our very life for more of Him? Is He the substance of our very life?
Is He so dear to us that we are willing to face rejection and persecution and still press forward toward more of Him? Is He our driving passion?

Are we going to let mosquitoes and little kitty-cats outdo us in our persistence toward the One Who gave His life that we might live? Toward Life Himself? Toward our Jesus?

Oh Lord, let me not be such a one!