It seems that just about everyone's
life has changed over the last month or so. Some of us are staying
home more than ever, some are with their kids all of the time for the
first time ever, some are barely ever able to be at home for the
first time ever and some...are becoming moms for the first time ever?
Throughout the last couple of years I
have had several dreams along the same theme. I always wake up from
these dreams stirred and wondering what they could mean. I don't
usually have dreams where I feel so much.
I am walking/sitting/visiting with
people when all of a sudden my stomach drops! My baby! I totally
forgot that I had a baby and I haven't fed it in hours! I rush to
find my baby limp, starving, but still alive. I quickly feed my baby
and he recovers. Relief. I sometimes have a boy and a girl, but
always at least a boy. Sometimes my baby is in someone else' care,
but is not thriving.
I wake up from these dreams and pray “Lord, what does this mean? Are you trying to tell me something? Do I have a baby out there that I am supposed to be caring for? Lord, please don't let me be negligent. Please don't let me miss my kid, if that's what I'm supposed to be doing.”
Fast forward to
about a month ago.
A little 8 year old
boy, we'll call him “Ben”, came to my parents for a day of
respite care.
I sat out on the
steps and talked to him for a while.
As I was setting
there my heart was moved with compassion for this little guy. Then
the Lord spoke to my heart “This is your boy”.
“Okay, Lord,
then you are going to have to do it.”, I replied. This little
exchange was very quick and unemotional. Just a silent little
conversation in my heart. A quiet and confident knowing.
I walked into the
house and my Mom was on the phone with the head of the organization
this little guy is in. “Would she be willing to get certified
and take the Ben for respite until ya'll could get approval to take
him?” “Yes” I said in answer the question as I overheard
it. “Of course I will”, I thought to myself, I already
know he is supposed to be mine. But believe me, I didn't say all of
that out load to my Mother. I knew that she would be all over that!
She has been wanting me to foster for years.
After later that
day I talked to Mom and Dad about it and Mom said that she knew that
it was the Lord because whenever she had brought up the possibility
of my taking in foster kids in the past I had always backpedaled. She
was right.
So, over the next
week I became a caregiver for this little guy while also doing
training and paperwork to become a Therapeutic Foster Parent and have
him officially placed in my home. TALK ABOUT A BUSY QUARINTINE! From
dawn 'till late at night I was going going going! My parents have
been amazing! Rachel Baker has also been a HUGE help and support
during this time.
So, as of this
month I am officially a foster Mom and (Lord willing) on my way to
being a forever Mom.
Jesus is good!
If you'd like to
hear more or have any questions feel free to call, text or email. I
would LOVE to hear from you! However, please take into consideration
that I now have an 8yo with lots of needs, so please forgive me if I
am late in responding, it's not because I am avoiding you :)